What is emotional Intelligence? It is described as: the capacity to be aware of, control, and express one’s emotions, and to handle interpersonal relationships judiciously and empathetically.
As Reiki healers, it can be so easy to fall into the trap…that ego trap…the one that tells us that we are doing just fine…that we are enlightened…compassionate…loving others unconditionally.
Being an instrument in the healing of another is awesome, but we often forget the saying that says: “Healer heal thyself”. We become so immersed in helping others that we forget to help ourselves, and what often happens is that we begin to express ourselves in needy or angry ways; we forget how to express our emotions in a way that is healthy and helpful rather than destructive and damaging. Self Reiki is meant to be a daily practice and one that we practice without fail.
What happens though is that we become complacent, running from one healing session to another, without remembering that this work cannot be done when we are running on empty.
So…Just for today…I will do my self Reiki and allow my body, mind and emotions to be balanced by this Creative healing.
Nathaniel Branden, the author of “The Psychology of Self-Esteem” and “The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem” says that the core idea that he has always wanted to teach is: “Your life is important. Honour it. Fight for your highest possibilities.”
As I contemplated these words, a few thoughts came to me. Firstly: Who would I be fighting in order to gain my highest possibilities? The answer came crashing through the usual muddle of thoughts that I have:
Sue the first, and probably the only, person that you would fight is yourself.
These words hit me with such force as the negative-speak which often has priority in my head usually rules over my more positive thoughts.
Secondly: Yes, my life is important, as is every single being on this planet. We each have a vital role to play in the continued well-being of all. A question that came up here for me was: What is your role in this crazy life you have? Well, I live with this question now, asking myself almost daily: “What do you need to do today to live your best life?”
Finally, how do I honour my life? Well, for today, the answer that came through is to know that my life is balanced and in order and all is well. And just for today, that has been achieved through self-Reiki, cleaning my living and working space, eating as healthily and well as I know how at this moment in time, and…Reaching out to share with others.
The subtle body is connected to the physical body by energy vortexes called chakras. Essential oils can stimulate and assist in the process of awakening, healing, opening and strengthening the chakras. Essential oils are the spirit (the essence) of plants. The oils can be used on acupuncture or shiatsu points and to massage and on the chakras when doing meditation and using visualization. They can be applied directly on the physical body (add to a little carrier oil first).
The first Chakra: Fears: Fears of physical survival, abandonment by the group, and the loss of physical disorder. Strengths: Tribal/family identity, bonding, and the tribal honour code; the support and loyalty that give one a sense of safety and connection to the physical world.
Suggested pure essential oils: peppermint, frankincense, cedarwood, myrrh, ginger, and benzoin.
The second Chakra: Fears: Fears of loss of control, or being controlled by another, through the dominating power of events or conditions such as addiction, rape, betrayal, impotence, financial loss, abandonment by our primary partner or professional colleagues. Also fears of the loss of power of the physical body. Strengths: The ability and stamina to survive financially and physically on one’s own and to defend and protect one’s self; the ‘fight or flight’ instinct; the ability to take risks; the resilience to recover from loss whether family members, partners, property, occupation, or finances; the power to rebel and re-establish a life; and personal and professional decision-making ability and talent.
Suggested pure essential oils: Ylang Ylang, cinnamon, petitgrain, myrrh, pine cypress, rose geranium, geranium.
The Third Chakra: Fears: Fears of rejection, criticism, looking foolish, and failing to meet one’s responsibilities; all fears related to physical appearance, such as a fear of obesity, baldness, or ageing; fears that others will discover our secrets. Strengths: Self-esteem, self-respect, and self-discipline; ambition, the ability to generate action, and the ability to handle a crisis; the courage to take risks; generosity, ethics, and strength of character.
The Fourth Chakra: Fears: Fears of loneliness, commitment, and ‘following one’s heart’; fear of inability to protect oneself emotionally; fear of emotional weakness and betrayal. Loss of fourth chakra energy can give rise to jealousy, bitterness, anger, hatred, and an inability to forgive others as well as oneself. Strengths: Love, forgiveness, compassion, dedication, inspiration, hope, trust, and the ability to heal oneself and others.
The fifth Chakra: Fears: Fears relating to our willpower exist within each chakra, appropriate to that chakra. We fear having no authority or power of choice within our own lives, first within our tribes, then within our personal and professional relationships. Then we fear having no authority with our selves, being out of control when it comes to our response to substances, to money, to power, to another person’s emotional control over our well-being. And finally, we fear the will of God. The notion of releasing our power of choice to a Divine force remains the greatest struggle for the individual seeking to become conscious. Strengths: Faith, self-knowledge, and personal authority; the capacity to make decisions knowing that no matter what decision we make, we can keep our word to ourselves or another person.
Suggested pure essential oils: Lavender, spearmint, frankincense, cypress.
The Sixth Chakra: Fears: An unwillingness to go within and excavate one’s fears; fear of truth when one’s reason is clouded; fear of sound, realistic judgement; fear of relying on external counsel; of discipline; fear of one’s own shadow side and its attributes. Strengths: Intellectual abilities and skills; evaluation of conscious and unconscious insights; receiving inspiration; generating great acts of creativity and intuitive reasoning-emotional intelligence.
Suggested pure essential oils: Frankincense, cedarwood, pine, rosemary, thyme.
The seventh Chakra: Fears: Fears relating to spiritual issues such as the ‘dark night of the soul’; fears of spiritual abandonment, loss of identity, and loss of connection with life and people around us. Strengths: Faith in the presence of the Divine, and in all that faith represents within one’s life-such as inner guidance, insight into healing, and a quality of trust that eclipses ordinary human fears; devotion.
Suggested pure essential oils: Benzoin, frankincense, myrrh, lavender, ravensara, basil and rosemary.
What causes us to become ill at the most inopportune times? Why is it that students become ill with tonsillitis or a cold at exam time? The higher our stress levels, the more susceptible we seem to become to illnesses. During July this year (Our Winter here in the Southern Hemisphere), I became ill during the most busy period of the month. I was not able to work for two days and my business partner had to carry the load of work for the two of us.
This again made me ponder on why this happens. Deb Shapiro, in “Your Body Speaks Your Mind” says “excessive stress has a direct effect on the immune system, as it lowers the ability to destroy invading viruses and bacteria through the production of adrenaline and cortisol.” Now this made total sense to me as I had seen it time after time within myself. At the times when I needed to function at my best, I would get sick with a cold or have a severe sinus attack.
As I learnt more about the power of our minds over our bodies, I also learnt the tools that can help us alleviate the levels of stress under which we live.
Meditation: Simple mindfulness meditation. Being aware of our breath and taking the time to sit still for at least 20 minutes (Not an easy task for many of us)
Reiki: This simple tool reduces our stress levels immensely. The more Reiki we practice (or experience) the more balanced our minds and bodies become.
Healthy eating: We may have different dietary needs from each other, but we know when we are eating something that is bad for us…Our bodies feel the pain, or the heaviness of it.
Exercise: Whether we are athletic or not, exercise is vital. Our sedentary lifestyle leads to health issues that our ancestors knew nothing of. So whether you need a lot of exercise, or a simple walk around the block, get moving!
Our health is our responsibility. There are times when we are mean to our bodies and push them beyond their limits…Just for today, let us be more mindful of what we are doing and be conscious of caring for ourselves on every level.
When students learn Reiki, it comes as a surprise to learn that healing starts with us.
The very first thing we do is learn that we can heal ourselves. That has not been a concept that we have learned from our outside world. Out there we are taught that someone else has to fix every sniffle and snuffle; every headache and backache. Now we are taught that our bodies first line of defense should be to keep ourselves balanced, to be aware of our self talk-what we think is what we do (or what we believe).
So, when we learn Reiki, we start by learning self Reiki. Placing our hands on specific parts of our bodies – relating to our energy centres (Chakras and acu-points). These positions were taught by the founder of this specific method of subtle energy healing, Dr Mikao Usui.
When I started learning Reiki, the thing that intrigued me the most was how calm my Reiki teacher was. My fellow student and myself would arrive for lessons harassed and with a hundred and one reasons why it was impossible to practise self Reiki for a full hour every day. The teacher would just smile and encourage us to give it our concerted effort for at least twenty-one days.
Looking back at that time, I can feel compassion for my younger self. In this world of quick fixes and instant access, it is challenging to slow ourselves down, to take a moment to breathe. It is even more difficult to spend time alone with ones self and give love and compassion which is directed within.
The most encouraging and exciting news that I can give you today is that it really does work. With perseverance, and a little bit of self-love, the daily self Reiki becomes a good and healthy habit. The positive outcome of a daily dose of self Reiki is that fears, worries and anxieties subside.
If you would like to learn how to do self Reiki, my next class begins on the second Sunday in July. The classes are once a week for 7 weeks. The lessons include basic energy healing (learning more detail about chakras, auras and meridians) and Reiki 1.
For more information or to book your space, please contact me via email, whatsapp or telephone.
The year has begun and what better way to start it than with a loving gift to yourself. We could all do with a little more joy in our lives. Sometimes the stresses and worries of everyday life can seem overwhelming. By connecting deeply with our emotional heart we can learn to relax and celebrate life.
Joy is a quality of the heart that happens when your body, mind and heart all function in harmony. When you are joyful your body is relaxed, your mind is calm and your heart is overflowing with energy, love and peace.
1. Sit relaxed with your eyes closed. Breathe deeply a few times and sigh on each out breath.
2. Place your hands on the middle of your chest and bring to mind a past or current situation that has caused or is causing you pain or suffering. Breathe in and welcome the feeling. If tears come, just let them happen. Accept any emotion that arises and allow yourself to move deeply into the simple energy of the feeling, without the mind putting labels or judgements on it.
3. Then, as you breathe out, reconnect with a feeling of peace, love or joy. Allow the out breath to carry the blessings of peace, joy and love.
(This meditation is taken from the following book: Reiki for Emotional Healing by: Tanmaya Honervogt)
I often get asked the question: Why do you practice Reiki? What does it actually do for you? Well, this time I would like to answer that question from a more personal point of view.
A big part of Reiki is self Reiki. A person who has done the first level of Reiki is encouraged to do self Reiki as a daily discipline. Doing this on a daily basis helps keep me in a balanced state. It also keeps me mindful of this present moment and helps me to stay present to what is happening now without me constantly living in the past with such words as “Remember when we…” or “If only…”. Or projecting into the future with such words as “What if…?” or “Maybe…”. Yesterday has gone, tomorrow still has to be unwrapped, but I am here in this eternal moment.
Over the past nine years, I have slowly gotten better at practising regularly, and those weeks when I keep to the discipline of self Reiki on a daily basis, I am able to remain present to whatever life has to teach me. To remain calmer, more caring and more open and accepting of others.
This gentle, hands on, technique has helped me to learn from my mistakes, to curb my anger and to be compassionate with myself as I continue to learn and grow in this life.